COMMERCIAL IDEAS

BFZ devotees already know that one of my hobbies is to come up with ideas for television commercials, but if you're new to these here parts (Howdy! and Welcome! by the way.) you may check out former examples of my marketing efforts HERE and HERE.

Today, I am bringing a pitch concept to the Milk Council. I think we'll all agree that although the "GOT MILK?" craze had its day the nation is tiring of this ad concept, and it is time to move in a fresh direction.

I propose that the Milk people piggy-back on the Dos Equis "Most Interesting Man in the World" commercials. The ad would be entitled "The Most Boring Man in the World."

First, the narrator, following exactly the format of the Dos Equis commercials, would offer up some amusing examples of how boring this man is;
"He once talked himself to sleep,"
"He keeps his socks and underwear in separate drawers."
"In his free time he likes to read and take walks."
"He collects teddy bears."*

"He is the most boring man in the world."

(Then the camera would pan to a rather ordinary looking fellow behind his desk at work. In front of him is a tall glass of cold milk.)

"I don't always drink things other than water, but when I do I drink milk."

* Of course, if you hired professional writers they could come up with some funnier material. I just submitted these to give the general idea.

COMMERCIAL IDEA

I am a complete teetotaler myself, but if a beer company wanted to avail themselves of my marketing genius I would give them this gem of an idea for a series of commercials to be run during the upcoming election cycle. As more and more americans turn to the news channels for information on the state of the elections I would recommend running a series of ads called "The Beer Party" on FOX news or something. We've all heard of the rise of the tea party, well in the commercials Americ would be introduced to "the beer party" and some of their hilarious policy positions. They might even nominate somebody for president- perhaps Bo Duke for President and Luke Duke for VP (...or vice versa? I can't keep those guys straight.) Can't you just see the secret service trotting along next to the General Lee?