Saturday, June 18, 2011

DEAR PRESIDENT OBAMA,

I recently purchased a 20 oz bottle of Diet Pepsi for $1.59 at a local grocery store. After doing a little math I was horrified to discover that the cost of my pepsi works out to about $10.17 a gallon!!! At current prices, the same 20 oz container filled with gasoline would only cost about $0.62. What's wrong with this picture? Was my Diet Pepsi pumped from beneath the Arctic ice shelf? Does it originate from beneath the burning sands of some war-torn middle-eastern dictatorship? Can gasoline quench my thirst the same way that Diet pepsi does? No, no and I wish!!! We all know that not drinking Diet Pepsi is simply not an option. So I am writing to you, esteemed Mr. President, to do something about this very serious problem. Some weeks I have to choose between pepsi or eating. Sometimes I even have to travel to Mexico to get my pepsi. That's not right. As an American I feel that I should be able to able to purchase my pepsi with dignity and at an affordable price.

Thank you, Mr. President, for your kind consideration of my concerns,

Respectfully,

Chad Irving

9 comments:

Chad said...

we should be hearing from the President any time now :)

Josh Tate said...

Clearly government needs to intervene on behalf of all of us little people. Thanks for taking the initiative, Chad.

Rocket Surgeon, Phd said...

These are troubling times.

Josh Tate said...

Indeed.

steve said...

I remember a very similar Job post from long ago

steve said...

Found it in less than a minute!

Josh Tate said...

P.T. Barnum once said something to the effect of "Creativity is just a matter of concealing your sources."

Before you accuse me of plagiarism I must say that I had forgotten all about Job's post. I must confess it is thematically similar though.

Steve said...

Not plagiarism at all, just similar reasoning

Josh Tate said...

Great minds and all of that... I knew you weren't acusing me of anything. Just kidding around, ol' boy.