Wednesday, November 21, 2012


John Madden's voice makes me hungry. It's pavlovian! I hear Madden start to talk and I instantly start salivating and looking for the chips and dip. Football holds numerous such associations for me. Over the span of numerous seasons as a Redskins fan, which can only be described as frustratingly disappointing, I have come to harbor some ill-will toward a number of personalities on the NFL Network and ESPN. I also hate the football robot that dances and stretches before and after commercial breaks on Fox. If you didn't know, its name is "Cleatus." I have seen him dance his way through so many Redskin losses that I now feel as though he is taunting me with his automoton gyrations. Oh, he knows what he's doing! I simply cannot abide Troy Aikman as a color commentator either. Strangely, I feel some warmth towards Chris Berman of ESPN and also Steve Mariucci (Sp?) even though they have also been given the difficult job of delivering bad news to me over the years. They do so with sensitivity and class. In truth, I hope for a redskin win this weekend more than a fantasy win. That's why I load my fantasy fotoball team up with Redskins. That way I can root for them with a whole heart. Last weekend I played DeSean Jackson of the Philadelphia, Eagles on my fantasy squad despite the fact that he was playing against the Skins. I felt conflicted about it, but I decided that if the Redskins lost I might as well be consoled by the fantasy results, but still it felt weird and wrong to root for Jackson and the Redskins at the same time. (Jackson got a whopping 0 points by the way on 2 receptions for a total of 5 yards.) You cannot serve God and mammon both. This week I am glad that I have no Cowboys on my roster. I'll be rooting for the Skins with a whole heart tomorrow.

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